I was just here- in this space living my experience- perhaps only slightly aware that I was lost, when I got "found". 7 years ago, exactly, I was in the midst of a terrible illness-and scheduled to have my womb removed. This was happening at a time in my life where I couldn't find joy. I was looking. It was lost on me; it was gone from me. In those moments I had no understanding of the mind-body connection. At the time, I didn't realize that the sadness in my soul was most likely the reason for the sickness in my body. But! I had the presence of mind to know that I wanted to remain whole.
The night before the scheduled procedure, I was awakened from my sleep by something deep within. I spent some time with the book of Psalms, and was prompted to look into herbal remedies that might help heal my womb. I got caught up in the possibility of fixing myself without changing my life forever... Needless to say, I called in sick to my surgery.
As my herbal journey ensued, my husband urged me to try cannabis for my nausea, and pain. I was unable to keep anything down, or to function on any basic level because the discomfort was so intense. I had long since given up the use of recreational cannabis, and didn't have any reason to believe there was any medicinal properties tied to something I had come to see as a vice in my life. Completely over the side effects of the pain medicine I'd been prescribed, and desperate for a shred of normalcy, I inhaled a joint for the first time in three years. The coughing was uncomfortable, the smell bothered me, and the high was way too much- but I could not deny the immediate pain relief. I could not deny the absence of the nausea, or the increase in my appetite. I'd fallen in love with my first herb.
I set out to find alternative ways to consume cannabis, and found that in a steeped tea- the head high was lessened, but, the body high was perfection. At the same time hundreds of other herbs found their way into my heart, mind, body, and soul. I began a love affair with Nature and her nurturing ways. An excitement was born in me as I began to study, and mix- blend, and infuse. The teas I started to ingest daily, renewed an energy in me. My vessel came to life. My studies intensified. My purpose was redefined. Science and experimenting with the elements was never an interest- but I found myself concocting, deconstructing, and rebuilding, every second of the day. The idea of transforming simple elements from nature into things that could fix a thing, overwhelmed me- completely- and in my life alchemy was elevated to the highest of highs...
By the time I made it in to see a specialist (it took three months from my previously scheduled surgery to get an appointment), I was advised that there was no sign- no reason whatsoever to perform surgery. After reviewing my files, and examining me- my doctor asked what I'd done, and I gave him a break down of the herbal regiment I'd taken. I told him of the energy cleansing, and mindfulness techniques I'd adopted, and he said... and I tell you I will never forget the words, or the feelings associated with the words spoken- he said, "You did the right thing, but, I'm not supposed to tell you that." I've relied on The Creator for the care of my womb ever since.
For the past seven years, I have been a vessel. I use herbs in topicals, decoctions, tinctures, healing baths, and more. I've been introduced to energy work, and spiritual practices that have carved out a path of greater understanding. I am an ever grateful, obedient student of life. And as I learn, I will share...